The Male Species.

december 1, 2009.

it’s species, right?
not feces...(haha)

it amazes me how it happens every time
and as if it couldn’t get worse it's when we’re at our prime.
Things seem perfectly fine
when your heart is finally mine
well at least it seems that way
until you call me at the end of the day.
“it’s not you, it’s me” said The Male Species. jerk.
“you’re right, it is you” i wanted to say when he didn’t wanna make it work.
i just have one question...
do all Male Species really cause so much frustration?
i’d like to say it’s so
but truly i can’t say that i know.
Because at the end of the phone line
that Male Species was simply not mine.
God created The Male Species and He said it was good.
i can’t wait till he gives me mine,
the One that will love me the way he should.
Until that day, i’ll probably complain a couple more times
because the Male Species ...
Well, they are known for their CRIMES.

Missed.

november 29, 2009.

i miss him and i don’t.
i wish i could choose but it’s too hard, so i won't.
he’s so far, yet when i hear his voice,
he makes it so hard, i truly have no choice.
but if i could, i’d choose to not miss him
because then when he left, it wouldn’t seem so dim.
but in the end i guess i’m just selfish
because to be more than friends is my true wish.
i’ll never admit that though
because i'll never let it show
i only wonder if he misses me too?
and if so... there has to be something we can do...?

This Feeling.

november 13, 2009

it’s such and awkward feeling

what i feel inside.
it’s sometimes unexplainable
so i put it aside.
But is it normal?
do you feel it sometimes too?
or am i alone in this?
What should l do?
i take deep breaths,
count to 10, hopefully that will work.
No, it’s still there
is it sadness, madness, regret? it’s unfair.
it’s a pain so deep, is my heart still there?
i promise I'm normal i live life day to day.
i breath in the same air you do, my heart beats just like yours does.
but, it’s still there.
the silence is now hurting me. it’s so loud
if only you knew, if only i didn’t act so proud.
i took the chance, i fell for love
only to fall straight down, just like with a broken wing falls the dove.
i had dreamed of this, how perfect it felt.
but in the dream i was secure, this feeling i hadn’t dealt.
Now i’m awake. and how i long to sleep
it would make me feel better, for this feeling i do not want to keep.
i can only hope it wont last much longer.
although through this pain i’ll end up much stronger.


It was such an awkward feeling, what i felt inside.
so i got on my knees and to Jesus i cried...